Canoeing with Sharks 2: Am I Really on the Menu?

Canoeing with Sharks 2: 
Am I Really on the Menu?

by
Dean Burkey

Continued from yesterday, 
so please read my previous post: 
Canoeing with Sharks

Otherwise, 
I open this brief recap will suffice: 
When I went camping with Bigfoot, 
we got in a fight. 
After I left him on shore while I went canoeing, 
he summoned all kinds of sharks to attack. 
I quickly tried to make amends, 
so he called off the sharks. 
Only the largest one didn’t get the message. 
Or he got it; and ignored it. 
The Mega-Giant Shark swam from below 
and smashed the canoe in half, 
which sent me flying high into the sky. 
Like a highly-paid center fielder, 
the shark waited below with open jaws, 
ready to catch me and swallow me whole. 
Bigfoot didn’t seem to be any help at all, 
wailing away at my forthcoming annihilation. 
When all of a sudden, 
things got worse ... 

As if falling toward the open jaws 
of a huge honking shark wasn’t bad enough, 
the hungry sea predator flapped his mighty tail 
to rise toward me. 
Talk about fast food! 

The sucker couldn’t even wait for gravity. 

“Hey Chewie! 
A little help please!”

Little Known Fact: 
Bigfoots, (Bigfeet?),
Sasquatches, Yetis, Abominable Snowpeople, 
and other creatures covered in fur, 
including my Uncle Cleatus and Aunt Carrie, 
hate being called Chewbacca!*
Or Chewie. 
(Which is short for Chewbacca.)

I knew that would get his attention. 
Which it did. 
Snapped him out his writing my eulogy.  

Little Known Fact: 
Bigfoot can’t swim. 

Or maybe he can, 
but he hates the water. 
Takes forever for all his hair to dry. 
So he couldn’t do a thing to rescue me. 
Or could he? 

Guess not. 
My life flashed before my eyes 
as my head and upper torso fell into the shark’s mouth. 
I remembered the fun I had time-traveling.**
I regretted not being able to make Katharine McPhee 
the happiest woman in the world. 

Other than that, 
I already planned the perfect last day of my life,***
so I was ready to check out. 
I just didn’t want to. 
Not through the intestinal tract of an overgrown guppy. 

As the shark’s jaws started to snap shut, 
which surely would have torn me asunder. 
But not in a good way. 
Something screeched and yanked me away. 
Literally at the last possible millisecond. 

Somehow Biggie summoned a pterodactyl 
from the Inner Earth.****
Terry, 
as I affectionately called the lifesaving pterodactyl, 
flung me onto the shore. 
The shark splashed down and swam away. 
Terry shrieked and flapped away. 
Although rejoicing to have survived 
such a harrowing adventure, 
I grimaced to see how Terry crapped 
all over my life jacket. 
Which, 
although I didn’t think I had anything left in me, 
made me barf once more all over said jacket. 
Ew! 
Was that my gall bladder? 

Biggie didn’t mind my barf or the dinosaur poop. 
He hugged me, happy that I was alive. 
I hugged him back and said, 
“You know I only meant the free prize 
in the Cocoa Puffs; right? 
I still get whatever comes inside 
Trix and Lucky Charms.” 

Biggie growled; 
and the Goliath shark, 
whom I affectionately dubbed Adolf Bin Laden,
plopped onto the shore next to us, 
snapping his jaws like toddlers with tater tots. 

I forced my famous smile and said, 
“Just kidding”. 
Biggie nodded at the shark, 
who plopped back into the water; 
and this time, 
I’m pretty sure he really swam away. 
But just in case, 
I gave Biggie all the free toys he wanted; 
and let him win every game we played. 
Including Scrabble. 
Even though QEZPNIK’s not a real word.

As to be expected, 
the campground owner made me pay 
for the smashed canoe 
and the severely soiled life vest. 
We agreed to go halfsies on the price, 
since I convinced Bigfoot to give him an autograph. 

Biggie agreed, 
but out of spite, 
he misspelled his name. 

And that was me canoeing with sharks. 
Whether that really happened; 
or that was just an elaborate allegorical metaphor 
for dealing with the politics of life, 
I can honestly say: 
“I’ll never wear a life jacket again.”***** 

All the Best,

Dean Burkey

* The big hairy creature from the Star Wars movies.

** See my previous posts: 
Time-Traveling with Hollywood Hunks
and
Time-Traveling with Hollywood Hunks 2: 
The Uncivil Civil War

*** See my previous post: 
How We Spend Our Last Day on Earth Says A Lot 
About Who We Are ...

**** See my previous posts:

Beggar Gone Bad, 

The Unexpected Peril of Paramotoring, 

Down the Dragon’s Hole,

Inside the Hollow Earth, 
The Perfect Ploy To Take Over the World,
and
Is This Really The End?

***** Another line from my favorite movie: Jaws. 
(My favorite movie until my screenplays get made!) 

How Jaws Should Have Ended

Uploaded on Jun 24, 2011 by

HISHEdotcom

Dean Burkey:
Being eaten by a shark’s only funny; 
if you or the shark 
wears Groucho Marx glasses.

Author Unknown:
Who gives sharks presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws!

From Channel Surfing:

“Uh-huh.”  

Not realizing one shouldn’t interrupt when someone’s watching a scary shark movie, Cindy continued, “And remember we have dinner with my parents tonight at Daddy’s club.”  

“Uh-huh.”  

Doubting Brad’s attentiveness, she said, “I’m pregnant with octuplets.”  

More horrified by what he heard than by anything in a movie about mutated CGI monster sharks, Brad bolted upright.  “Dinner with your parents?!”  

Cindy plopped next to Brad and stroked his hair.  He sighed.  

“I’m sorry, baby.  I know how dull those dinners can be.”  

Little did she know that past performance is not indicative of future results. …  

Author Unknown:
Who is the shark community's 
favorite 1950s film actress?
Dorsal Day

Dean Burkey:
The first time you sleep in a waterbed, 
you will dream you are on the Titanic.  
After the iceberg incident, 
you will dream you are in the movie JAWS.  
And when JAWS swims at you, 
any bed becomes a waterbed.

Robert Schimmel

Funny Stand Up Comedy about Shark

Uploaded on Jun 29, 2011 by

supercalifragilismic

How We Spend Our Last Day on Earth Says A Lot About Who We Are ...

How We Spend 
Our Last Day on Earth
Says A Lot About Who We Are ...

Photo Source: Beauty Of Sunset by MALIZ ONG

I’d wake up and enjoy Belgian waffles with strawberries and whipped cream. Maybe an omelet or two. Something unique, not made with eggs so much, but Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, ginger snap cookies, and bananas. 

I’d read 1st Corinthians 13, Psalm 23, John 3, and Revelation 22 from The Holy Bible. 

Pray a heartfelt prayer of faith, hope, and love. With added emphasis on love. 

And then I’d read the space alien chapter from “Monster Laughs”.

Doing so would make me laugh. No need to let a silly thing like global annihilation ruin my day. 

Even if it is. Gulp! My last. 

Write several million-dollar checks to well-meaning charities, because I know how happy that would make them feel during their last few hours on Earth. 

And that would make me feel better about the world ending, because otherwise, I’d get in a ton of trouble for writing bogus checks. 

Maybe I’d even write a joke or two. Something hilarious with the punchline: “That’s the way the world crumbles.” 

Or “That’s no chicken; that’s my foot!”

After all that, I’d enjoy a hearty bowl of Cocoa Puffs with chocolate milk, bananas, and liquefied peanut butter. 

Then I’d call and say I love you and farewell to all the people who truly love me. 

Both of them. 

Just so I won’t forget to do so before my favorite planet falls apart as the huge asteroid comes closer.  

Paramotor with a pal around the beaches and volcanoes of Hawaii, looking for the legendary island where bikini supermodels frolic in the waves.

Lunch would be shish kebabs with flank steak, using grain-fed beef, of course. (In case the world doesn’t end, I don’t want to be stupid.) Stuffing with gravy. Peach and/or pear juice to drink. Chocolate mint pie for dessert. 

Listen to Boston’s album Boston while playing my best friend’s favorite video game. Preferably one where we “save the world”.

Play beach volleyball with my paramotoring pal and a dozen bikini supermodels. (We found the island!) 


Elope with whichever supermodel passes my quiz, which none of them even realize they’re taking. 

“Take a nap” with my supermodel bride (the one who won the tiebreaker question of: Why is Stan Lee clearly the most important writer of the 20th century?).

Setting aside a lifetime of fears caused by “Jaws”, I’d skinny dip in the ocean with my newlywed wife and her friends. 

Listen to The Beatles’ albums Rubber Soul and Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Heart’s Club Band while drying in the sun with the aforementioned supermodels. 

Shower under a waterfall. Get dressed. Eat a banana split with mint chocolate chip ice cream and Dove chocolate, while listening to Michael Jackson’s Heal the World. 

Dance on the beach at a luau at sunset, savoring the lyrical accuracy as they play Elvis singing “And now, the end is near.” 

Walk along the shore, holding hands with my wife and eating Macadamia Nut White Chocolate Chip Cookies. 

Kiss my bride and tell her how much I had hoped she’d be the one who would answer my questions correctly. Tell her “never mind”, when she asks “What questions?” (I told you she never realized she was being quizzed.)

If time permits, I’d don a mask and cape and fight crime. Maybe stop a mugging or two. Share the luau food, including the Macadamia Nut White Chocolate Chip Cookies, with the hungry. And hopefully write another joke or two. Possibly with the punchline: “That’s what happens when the warranty expires.” 

Or “Can you believe they made a million dollars doing that?!”

Pray more prayers, thanking God for this beautiful day and for letting us enjoy the Earth for as long we did, giving special thanks for my supermodel wife. 

Take another “nap” with my aforementioned supermodel wife. 

Watch Brian Regan’s “I Walked on the Moon”, so we go to bed laughing. 

Wake up the next day, kiss my bride, maybe take another “nap”, and then devour buttered Cinnamon Pop Tarts and apple juice. And then, of course, I’d -- What?! The world didn’t end?!

That wasn’t a huge asteroid after all, just a smudge on the Hubble telescope.

Use Windex, you so-called brilliant scientists! 

Good thing I ate grain-fed beef. 

Ugh! I married a supermodel! I know, as far as ughs go, that’s one of the best. But still, ... 

Marrying for looks only works when you only have a day or two left to live. I need someone faithful, loving, and generous with a heart of gold and a delightful sense of humor. She doesn’t have to juggle and play the ukulele. But that would be nice. 

Especially if she could juggle ukuleles! 

I answer a knock at the door and find my self greeted by an assortment of cops, F.B.I. agent and S.W.A.T. team members. Gulp! 

Turns out that happiness wasn’t the emotion felt by those so-called well-meaning charities who received my bogus checks! 

While being finger-printed, I meet a scrawny, scruffy-looking girl who also wrote phony million-dollar checks to charities. We share a meaningful smile. And then the world ends. In one way or another. 

What a day!

Blessings & Joy,

Dean

P. S. If you like apocalyptic ramblings, 

please check out my previous post: 

Getting Ready for the End of the World

Skeeter Davis -- The End Of The World

Uploaded to YouTube on Jan 27, 2008 by

ALLEN0955

Skeeter performs her signature hit. From 1965

 

Sanity Check: Pass Or Fail?

Sanity Check: 
Pass Or Fail?

Photo Source: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000S94FRC

If you don’t check your sanity every so often, you’re probably insane. 

If you check it too much, it’ll make you insane. 

So obviously there’s a delicate balance to the grasping of one’s sanity. 

I sent in my Sanity Check test along with four box tops from specially marked packages of Cocoa Puffs. 

And, in six to eight weeks, I’ll be the first on my block to find out how my sanity checks out. 

But alas, I fear, my sanity may have already checked out. 

The samples shown online indicated that everyone taking the test is ultimately declared: Cuckoo! 

Yes, my friends, Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. 

But I guess it’s a given that if you eat four specially marked boxes of Cocoa Puffs, you are, at least to some extent, indeed, Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs. Cuckoo like a clock! 

Sweet chocolaty delight toying with my sanity like it’s a shrink-wrapped plastic toy that comes in six different colors. 

Since I already know the declaration of insanity is forthcoming, I should go ahead decide what kind of crazy I want to be. 

Hmm. ...

An ax-wielding psycho in a hockey mask? 

No way! The mask would be too stuffy, especially in a temperate climate. 

And even a nut job doesn’t want to haul around a heavy ax everywhere he goes. 

I don’t know how the wackos with chainsaws do so. 

Especially with all that noise, the added weight, and the rising costs of chainsaw upkeep.

A drooling dude on a park bench who feeds the pigeons 

and mumbles to himself about the one that got away? 

Nothing against the pigeons, but that sounds boring. 

And the excessive drooling can get messy. 

And expensive, depending on local dry cleaning costs. 

Besides, I pushed away all the ones that got away, so I’m in the clear in that regard. 

More or less. 

Okay, less. 

Oo! Oo! 

I could be one of those goobers 

who lives in denial! 

Gasp! Or maybe I already am!

Or I could be someone whose grasp of reality 

is flimsy at best. 

Then I could write a blog and create all sorts of crazy fun adventures. 

Nawwww! 

Blessings & Joy,

Dean

P.S. The irony, or paradox, if any, is that I didn’t even eat Cocoa Puffs this week. It’s my reward for when I finish a screenplay, but I’m not done with my latest one yet. (Actually, I finished yesterday, so I will soon be enjoying bowlfuls of that crazy chocolate delight!)

How to Turn a Video into a Movie

How to Turn a Video into a Movie

Believe it or not, Paramount plans to turn the following video into a major motion picture. (Maybe “major” isn’t the right word.) ...

This video uploaded to YouTube by klaatu42 on May 1, 2011

So I thought I’d help them, by plotting the story.

FADE IN: 

EXT. OUTER SPACE -- DAY

A fleet of UFOs zigzag and zoom through a meteorite shower. 

A meteorite hits the saucer in back and sends it caroming to Earth. 

EXT. EARTH -- MID-TO-LATE AFTERNOON

With the other aliens onboard killed in the crash, Zeflon, the sole survivor, snaps into action and uses his intergalactic shape-shifting abilities to turn himself into a Great White Shark. 

Unfortunately, he’s not in water and dies. 

EXT. EARTH -- MID-TO-LATE AFTERNOON, BUT SLIGHTLY CLOSER TO LATE AFTERNOON THAN MID-AFTERNOON

Seconds later, another UFO crashes to Earth, but this time, Yafleur, the sole survivor, snaps into action and uses his intergalactic shape-shifting abilities to turn himself into a Great Dane.

Unfortunately, he is in water and dies. 

Paradoxically, eaten by a Great White Shark.

EXT. EARTH -- ANYTIME, EXCEPT DUSK* 

The following week, another UFO crashes to Earth, but this time, Kakoolie, the sole survivor, snaps into action and uses his intergalactic shape-shifting abilities to turn himself into a wiener dog, complete with a collar studded with strange space alien stones.

Fortunately, he’s not in water, so he bounds from his crashed spacecraft, wagging his tail. 

He gazes at the wonders of the world before him and says: “Where can a cuddly canine get some Purina Dog Chow**?”

ROLL OPENING CREDITS.

PLAY THE THEME SONG: Collie Rae’s “Bark at Me Maybe”.

EXT. CITY -- 4:17 P.M. (OR A.M., WHICHEVER IS BRIGHTER TO CUT BACK ON LIGHTING COSTS)

Kakoolie prances downtown following every delicious scent that comes his way. 

But a dog catcher catches him. 

(Kakoolie forgot to shape-shift a doggy license around his neck!) 

Kakoolie pleads for his life. 

Hearing the dog speak, the catcher overwhelmed with guilt for all the sweet mutts he’s put away, suffers a heart attack and dies. 

Kakoolie frees a French poodle named Colletta from the back of the dog catcher’s van and falls in love. 

EXT. ALLEY -- 4:17 P.M. (OR A.M., WHICHEVER IS DARKER TO CREATE A VISUAL CONTRAST)

Colletta leads Kakoolie into a back alley where they eat scraps tossed away by Chef Pierre. 

Kakoolie and Colletta enjoy a happy life, until three seconds later, the mob moves in on Chef Pierre’s highly successful Pastries R Us Shoppe. 

Seeing only dogs, the thugs Tom and Jerry discuss the crime boss’ clandestine criminal plans. 

Kakoolie tells them to leave; or he’ll go to the cops with the crime boss’ clandestine criminal plans, which will lead to the execution style deaths of Tom and Jerry. 

Or, at they very least, they won’t be able to have seconds of pudding at the next crime boss picnic. 

Since they both like pudding, Tom and Jerry argue about what to do. 

Hearing a voice, but seeing only dogs, Tom and Jerry think the other’s setting them up, so they draw and fire, killing each other. 

But that’s not the end of them!

Those strange space alien stones on Kakoolie’s collar emanate an eerie cosmic radiation that causes corpses not to die. 

Or rather, not to stay dead. 

Thus begins a global zombie apocalypse. 

INSERT AN AMUSING MONTAGE SCORED BY PATTI PAGE’S “(HOW MUCH IS) THAT DOGGIE IN THE WINDOW”

After many shady shenanigans and a whole slew of hilarious hijinks ensue, Kakoolie and Colletta hijack a dinghy and row to a deserted island where seven stranded castaways eat Colletta for lunch. 

EXT. ISLAND -- DAY

Mary Ann’s offer to make coconut pie for dessert is met with an unfavorable response by the others. 

(Some might call it mass hysteria or mob frenzy.) 

We are now down to six castaways. 

Thanks to those strange space alien stones and a bamboo meat cleaver, Zombie-Mary Ann reduces the number of castaways to zero!

All seven Zombie-Castaways suddenly have a hankering for doggy brains.

Kakoolie escapes their canine decapitating culinary plans and dog paddles to America.

Why didn’t the Professor ever think of this?

EXT. BEACH -- DAY

After swimming ashore, Kakoolie gets adopted by a retired clown who wears a squirting flower and says: “What a fine looking dog you are, I bet you could use a home.”

Unfortunately for Kakoolie, the retired clown thinks it’s fun to tease dogs.

INT. DEN -- NIGHT

So Kakoolie’s new owner teases him with food. Especially bacon. But you never joke around with bacon!

Hungry after such a long swim, and still morose over the loss of Colletta, Kakoolie groans in exasperation.

Thinking that’s the funniest sound in the world, the owner laughs uproariously.

Not liking to be pranked, and crazy from hunger and grief, Kakoolie expands his jaws wider than a normal dog can and eats the laughing owner in one bite. 

KA-CHOMP!

The owner stops laughing.

Truly, THE ULTIMATE DOG TEASE!

AND NOW, FOR THE BIG SURPRISE TWIST ENDING: 

SPOILER ALERT! Bruce Willis has been a ghost the whole time! But the Chief of Police stops him by shoving a scuba tank in his mouth and blowing it up with his last bullet. The explosion sends the enforcer of the Dark Side spinning away in outer space. But he’ll come back in the sequel to tell Luke he’s his father. And then as they leave Ape City behind, they find the Statue of Liberty half buried in the sand and realize that not only have they been on Earth the whole time, but the arm holding the torch held up for thousands of years. And then Kakoolie wakes up suddenly to discover that it had all been a weird and wacky dream, inspired by having eaten before going to bed: Two bowls of the new Chipotle Cocoa Puffs. But then he wakes up again to discover that it wasn’t a dream after all, except for the part about the chipotle-flavored Cocoa Puffs. Or was that the only part that was real? 

FADE OUT.

ROLL CLOSING CREDITS.

INCLUDE THE DELETED SCENE WITH THE DANCING NINJAS. (CUT FOR PACING PURPOSES ONLY.)

IF MORE FILLER IS NEEDED, THE CAST AND CREW SINGS: “WHO LET THE DOGS OUT?”

END CLOSING CREDITS.

FADE IN: 

EXT. CITY -- EARLY-TO-MID-MORNING, AFTER SUNRISE, BUT BEFORE THAT ANNOYING TALK SHOW COMES ON

Destitute, hungry, Kakoolie roams the city streets, until a retired clown with a joy buzzer in his hand sees him and says: “What a fine looking dog you are, I bet you could use a home.”

CAPTION: The End?***

FADE OUT.

Photo Source: http://blog.comixconnection.com/2012/04/ultimate-dog-tease-video.html

Blessings & Joy,

Dean

* An homage to Steve Martin!

** Product placements help defray production costs. ;o)

*** This sets the stage for the sequel “Barking Dawn” where Kakoolie finds himself emotionally torn between a Vampire-Poodle named Dominique and a Werewolf-Schnauzer named Schultzie. Includes a hilarious tug of war scene, a naughty PG-13 car-washing scene, and the romantic theme song: Selena Greyhound’s “Love You Like a Fire Hydrant”.

What Makes a Psycho Pyscho

What Makes a Psycho Pyscho

Photo Source: The 2002 Lionsgate film:
American Psycho II: All American Girl*

I always like to present Things You Need to Know, so here I go: 

What Makes a Psycho Pyscho … 

Obviously, the psycho’s not a psycho at first; otherwise psycho relationships would never begin. 

(Unless the psycho’s totally gorgeous.) 

(Or both parties are psychos, to one extent or another.) 

(But aren’t we all, to one extent or another, slightly askew?)

(Personally, I think it’s the overuse of parentheses that makes people go bonkers, cuckoo, loony tuney, quirky, quacky, always wacky, nuttier than crunchy peanut butter, a few chocolates short of a Whitman’s Sampler, one whose jacket is never crooked, someone suffering from Sanity Deficit Disorder.)

So my questions are: 

If the psycho can act non-psychotic at the beginning of a relationship, why doesn’t he/she act non-psychotic all the time? 

If you have that much control, just stop being a psycho! 

And psychos, when it comes to decision-making, why not follow the advice and counsel of the person in the relationship who hasn’t been pumped full of lithium and lit up like a Christmas tree with EST? 

Makes sense to me! 

But no, psychos always want to run the show. 

What’s really sad, is when psychos refuse to change and grow, 
which is, in essence, what makes someone a psycho. 

Einstein’s attributed with saying insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. 

Ergo, refusal to change and grow makes a psycho psycho. 

Or it could be that all those negative political ads make them crazy. 

Or silly commercials in general can generate nuttiness. 

Add in the rising price of gas; and it’s a wonder any of us are sane! 

But let’s not for one minute, not even for a 30-second commercial, ever blame Cocoa Puffs. 

How can it be wrong when it’s so chocolaty good? 

Ah, sweet insanity … 

I say we blame Big Pharma.

Blessings & Joy,

Dean

* I haven’t seen this movie, so I’m not recommending it. It’s rated R for violence and language, so viewer discretion is advised. I just needed a picture of an adorable psycho, so I chose Mila Kunis in her role as Rachael. 

** For more Cocoa Puffs’ fun, see: About Cocoa Puffs. 

Uploaded by ClassicCommercials4U on Nov 15, 2008

An old commercial for Cocoa Puffs cereal with Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

About Those Cocoa Puffs

About Those Cocoa Puffs

In my previous post: Last Night’s Celebrity Dream, I mentioned my eating Cocoa Puffs. Please let me explain.  

I usually eat healthy.

More or less.

But I accomplished a goal and wanted to celebrate! 

I “finished” the first and second drafts of a screenplay I’ve wanted to finish for a while. 

“Finished” is in quotes, because I still need to tweak the dialogue a bit more. Plus, screenplays and other stories rarely, if ever, seem like they’re completely done. 

I spent two full days wrapping up things. So the next day when I went grocery shopping, I wanted to reward myself. 

The night before General Mills ran a TV ad touting how whole grain is the main ingredient of their cereals. 

So I decided to buy Cocoa Puffs. 

I enjoyed them. 

I think every comedy writer should eat Cocoa Puffs. 

You may call me cuckoo, but eating Coca Puffs makes me feel funny. 

And I mean funny like a comedy writer, not funny like I ate too many breakfast bean burritos. 

And wouldn’t you know it?

In addition to the delicious, fun time I enjoyed, I also received a free curvy straw! 

How could this get any better? 

Eating Coca Puffs is the perfect way for adults to enjoy chocolate milk without feeling childish. 

Since my super sister’s cooking blog Rach and Me is so popular, I’m jumping on the bandwagon to share some recipes of my own! 

The Peanut Butter, Banana, 

and Cocoa Puffs Sandwich!

Even Elvis never enjoyed a sandwich this good. 

You spread peanut butter one side of a slice of bread. 

Spread Cocoa Puffs over the peanut butter and smoosh each chocolaty puff into place. 

Cut a banana in half widthwise and lengthwise. 

Lay those four pieces over the Cocoa Puffs. 

Place another slice of bread on top. 

Serve at room temperature. 

Unless the room’s too hot. 

In which case, adjust the thermostat as desired. 

Eat. Enjoy!

For those of you cutting back on bread, I have another option:

Peanut Butter Banana Cocoa Puffs Pops!

Pour Cocoa Puffs in a bowl. 

You can never go wrong doing that!

Peel a banana. 

Doesn’t have to be all at once, but peel enough to be able to take a few bites. 

Spread peanut butter on the top of the banana. 

Dip the peanut butter-covered part of the banana into the Cocoa Puffs. 

Serve at room temperature. 

Unless the room’s too cold. 

In which case, adjust the heater as desired. Or put on a sweater. 

Eat. Enjoy! 

Repeat this procedure until you finish the banana. 

For added fun, ...

Peel the entire banana and put it on a stick.

Spread peanut butter all over the banana.

And then roll the peanut butter-covered banana in Cocoa Puffs until Cocoa Puffs cover every bit of peanut butter.

Freeze!

And then you can enjoy a:

Peanut Butter Banana Cocoa Puffsicle!

Please remember to cut out the Box Tops For Education coupons and donate those to the school of your choice. 

If only we had more time, I could share my other great recipes like Bacon-Wrapped Cocoa Puffs, Teriyaki Cocoa Puffs Soufflé, and Cocoa Puffs Whipped Cream Casserole à la Mode. 

Blessings & Joy,

Dean