Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Thank You Warren Buffett!


Thank You 
Warren Buffett!

by Dean Burkey
 
Photo Source:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001OD41DY

I dreamt I met Warren Buffett! Theee Warren Buffett!

As we walked out of a lecture at FSC, I told him it was destiny that we met, because the day before I read a book that said to get a picture of the richest man in the world.

“Oh.” He smiled his famous multi-billionaire smile. “My picture inspires you?”


“No, actually,” I said, somewhat embarrassed. “I got a picture of Carlos Slim Helú. Hes the richest. Never mind. And, um, no offense.” 

As Warrens (I mean, Mr. Buffett’s) famous multi-billionaire smile wilted, I knew Id put both feet in my mouth. I could even taste my socks! 

But even so, recognizing the amazing opportunity before me, I still asked him for his secret to getting rich. 

He sighed, like maybe hed heard that question before. 

His aide asked if he was coming along, but he said he’d stay. 

Happy to hear how to create wealth from someone who clearly knows, I giggled with delight. But in a macho giggly way. 

We sat in the middle of a classroom where a few students studied off to the side. 

The lights were too bright for him, so I kept trying to adjust the switch where he wouldn’t be bothered, but I could still see. 

He said he wanted them at half, so I put the two light switches at half, but he wanted one of them at half and the other turned off completely, so I said, “You want them at a fourth.” 

Seeing a wave of exasperation sweep across his face, I said, “Half is fine and decided not to bicker over the quarter/half issue, even though I was clearly right in that regard. 

As I yanked out my notebook, which has a promo cover for my first book Holy Laughter! Humor in the Bible”, Warren (I mean, Mr. Buffett) said “The first thing is stocks.” 

Obviously, I wanted to write that down, but I kept trying to find a blankety-blank blank page upon which to write. 

Although I couldn’t find a blankety-blank blank page, I eventually asked what the second thing was; and he said to read the newspaper USA Today

And so, the only advice I got from my dream meeting with Warren Buffett was stocks and read USA Today

If you know how that will make me rich, please let me know. 

Looks like I need to eat the same spicy food tonight that I ate last night, so I can continue my dream seminar. 

Otherwise, I’ll call Carlos (I mean Señor Helú) and ask: “¡Hola mi amigo! ¿Cómo se enriqueció usted?”*

Blessings & Joy,

* [Hello my friend! How did you get rich?]

Although I did actually dream that I met Warren Buffett, this is still a work of humor/parody.


warren buffett strategy


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Amit Agarwal
10 must know investment principles of warren buffett









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Monday, January 28, 2013

Book Review: Jackson Baer’s What the H-ll


Book Review: 
Jackson Baer
What the H-ll

by Dean Burkey



Photo Source: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B005X2VI1U

*****************************************************

The book description found at http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B005X2VI1U reads as follows: 

Book Description

 October 11, 2011
What if everything you've been taught about Hell was wrong?

Many Christians think that Jesus is the only way to Heaven and those who

don't believe in Him will spend eternity in a literal and burning Hell. 

Is this what the Bible teaches? Will the majority of mankind spend

eternity in torment because they rejected God in this life?

"What the Hell" will show you what the Scriptures clearly teach about this subject
and where this idea of Hell came from. It's not about winning or losing
or even changing the Christian faith. It's about the honest pursuit of
truth.


whatthehellbook.com/the-book/

*****************************************************

That description intrigued me, so I had to read this book. Plus, it was FREE on Amazon Kindle yesterday, so that made me buy it! (Looks like it’s still FREE at the time of this blog posting, so hurry! Before the price goes back up.) 

My struggle with Christianity has always centered around H-ll, not Heaven, The Other H Place. Made no sense to me. No matter how many times well-meaning people and others tried to explain it. 

If a place of eternal torment exists, why do Christian people have children? Why risk your own progeny falling away and suffering in agony forever? 

How are we supposed to praise God for “saving” us, while others we know didn’t or wont make it? How can we be sure whether or not we have enough faith? And does our loving Lord and Savior Jesus Christ really want us to believe in Him only so we can avoid burning in eternal torment? 

Surely, Jesus wants us to believe in Him, because of Who He Is and because of His great acts of love and mercy, not simply so we can acquire “Fire Insurance”. 

To reinforce what I had already hoped was true, this book points out how the notion of The Other H Place doesn’t exist in the original text of the Bible; and only came into being around the fifth century and later. So thank you Jackson Baer for that! 

My only problem with “The Other H Place” not existing, is, in my mind, that rid us of the need for Jesus. Which didn’t feel right either. There are too many fulfilled prophecies and other historical facts to support Jesus. 

Jackson Baer points out that although there isn’t an eternal place of punishment, there will still be punishment meted out for those who reject Christ in this life. And such punishment will feel like an eternity for those who suffer it. So we still need Jesus! And we still need to share The Good News of Christ’s victory over sin, death, and the Devil with the whole world. 

I enjoyed the book and recommend this to both believers and nonbelievers as the author spoke to the heart of many of my concerns. He shows from Scripture, that is from properly translated Scripture, what The Bible actually says. 

I have a greater appreciation for God knowing that His love and mercy truly endures forever.

Such teachings do not line up with my LCMS upbringing, but like Martin Luther said, “Unless I am convinced by Scripture and by plain reason ... Here I stand. I can do no other.” 

Blessings & Joy,


Uploaded on Sep 13, 2011 by

whatthehellbook




   


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Friday, January 25, 2013

My Favorite Heaven-Bent Blog Posts from 2012

Last Friday,
I reposted my Heaven-Bent blog post 
as my post for My Favorite Blog. 
But today, 
I repost my post for My Favorite Blog 
as my Heaven-Bent blog post. 

While I enjoyed my book and movie reviews 
(including the incredibly popular post: Shark Movies), 
as well as my writing advice, 
encouraging/inspirational posts, 
and my own recipes, 
I must say that these are ...



Heaven-Bent Blog Posts
from 2012

by Dean Burkey





and it's even funnier sequel:





I enjoyed those two, 

because I think that was the first time 
I wrote a crazy story for a blog (part 1 anyway) 
based on something from my life. 
I merely exaggerated the events to create the comedy. 
I enjoyed part 2 
if only because of the silly picture I made as shown above. 
At the very least, 
these two posts inspired me to write crazy stories 
as if they actually happened to me. 
Such as ... 





Photo Sources:
My sampling of http://modernmarketingjapan.blogspot.com/2011/06/stunning-revelation-tokyo-man-grows.html, http://www.michael-jackson-photos.com/, and http://elvis-presley-fanclub.blogspot.com/2010_08_01_archive.html.





If only because of the silly picture 

I put together as shown above! 
But also, I think this was my first time 
teaming with either Elvis or Michael Jackson. 
Although technically, 
we didn't interact in that adventure. 
But we sure did in my favorite post(s) of all time, 
if only because of its epic nature, my 6-part post ...








This is my favorite, 

not only because of the 6-part epic quality, 
but also because of the cliffhangers 
at the end of the first 5 posts. 
Sometimes, even I didn't know 
what was going to happen next! 
Plus, I got to hang out with Elvis and Jacko, 
which is always fun. 
I enjoy hanging out with celebrities, real or imagined; 
and I also enjoy sci-fi adventures, 
like this one ...









Fun, because I used actual photographs 

from the Civil War where certain soldiers back then 
looked like famous actors from today! 
Which, believe it or not, 
made my unbelievable story believable. 
Or not.


My secret favorite ... 




Fun, because I listened to the song backwards 

and made note of whatever weird phrases I heard. 
This one got a lot of hits too! 
So why is this my secret favorite? 
It's all so silly. (Like many of my posts are.) 
Plus, perhaps, I'm embarrassed 
that I like that song as much as I do. 


So those are 

My Favorite Heaven-Bent Blog Posts from 2012
At least the ones that I can think of. 
In a way, all of them are my favorite, 
or I wouldn't post them. 
(Unless I'm in a hurry 
and have to post something!)


These have all been works of comedy/parody.



Thank you for joining me on my adventures! 

And welcome to you if you're new!











   



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Wednesday, January 23, 2013

The Pizza-Twirling Puppeteer


The Pizza-Twirling Puppeteer

by Dean Burkey

Photo Source: Pizza by Peter Griffin

With the economy in dire straits, Geppetto gave up his juggling career to work at The International House of Pizza, where he became so adept, he could twirl two slabs of dough and his toupee. 

His boss let customers watch his impressive antics, until Geppetto accidentally put cheese, sauce, and pepperoni on his hairpiece and wore dough on his head. 

After getting fired, Geppetto achieved fame by creating a wooden boy who struggled to tell the truth. 

And I.H.O.P found success switching from pizzas to pancakes. 

So all ended well, except for the customer who choked to death while eating his second slice of Geppetto’s pepperoni toupee. 

Blessings & Joy,
Dean


P. S. Please Note: This is a work of humor/parody. 


Pinocchio - I've got no strings

Uploaded on Aug 28, 2009 by
Th3ShAd0wKiD97







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