Showing posts with label celebrity dream. Show all posts
Showing posts with label celebrity dream. Show all posts

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Thank You Warren Buffett!


Thank You 
Warren Buffett!

by Dean Burkey
 
Photo Source:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001OD41DY

I dreamt I met Warren Buffett! Theee Warren Buffett!

As we walked out of a lecture at FSC, I told him it was destiny that we met, because the day before I read a book that said to get a picture of the richest man in the world.

“Oh.” He smiled his famous multi-billionaire smile. “My picture inspires you?”


“No, actually,” I said, somewhat embarrassed. “I got a picture of Carlos Slim Helú. Hes the richest. Never mind. And, um, no offense.” 

As Warrens (I mean, Mr. Buffett’s) famous multi-billionaire smile wilted, I knew Id put both feet in my mouth. I could even taste my socks! 

But even so, recognizing the amazing opportunity before me, I still asked him for his secret to getting rich. 

He sighed, like maybe hed heard that question before. 

His aide asked if he was coming along, but he said he’d stay. 

Happy to hear how to create wealth from someone who clearly knows, I giggled with delight. But in a macho giggly way. 

We sat in the middle of a classroom where a few students studied off to the side. 

The lights were too bright for him, so I kept trying to adjust the switch where he wouldn’t be bothered, but I could still see. 

He said he wanted them at half, so I put the two light switches at half, but he wanted one of them at half and the other turned off completely, so I said, “You want them at a fourth.” 

Seeing a wave of exasperation sweep across his face, I said, “Half is fine and decided not to bicker over the quarter/half issue, even though I was clearly right in that regard. 

As I yanked out my notebook, which has a promo cover for my first book Holy Laughter! Humor in the Bible”, Warren (I mean, Mr. Buffett) said “The first thing is stocks.” 

Obviously, I wanted to write that down, but I kept trying to find a blankety-blank blank page upon which to write. 

Although I couldn’t find a blankety-blank blank page, I eventually asked what the second thing was; and he said to read the newspaper USA Today

And so, the only advice I got from my dream meeting with Warren Buffett was stocks and read USA Today

If you know how that will make me rich, please let me know. 

Looks like I need to eat the same spicy food tonight that I ate last night, so I can continue my dream seminar. 

Otherwise, I’ll call Carlos (I mean Señor Helú) and ask: “¡Hola mi amigo! ¿Cómo se enriqueció usted?”*

Blessings & Joy,

* [Hello my friend! How did you get rich?]

Although I did actually dream that I met Warren Buffett, this is still a work of humor/parody.


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Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Last Night’s Celebrity Dream

Last Night’s Celebrity Dream


I love when I have Celebrity Dreams. 

Dreams where I hang out with celebrities. 

Last night I dreamed I was at the Democratic Convention; and Tina Louise asked me to get up and speak. 

(She portrayed actress Ginger Grant on Gilligans Island.) 

No one told me I’d be giving a speech. I hadn’t even planned on being at the Democratic National Convention, so I didn’t have a speech prepared. 

In the dream, Tina and I were good friends, so I opened by saying:  

Tina doesn’t know this, but whenever I see her, I think of the episode where she convinced Mister Howell she could see the future which made Mister Howell think she could make him even more rich, so whenever he’d see her, he’d say ‘Ginger money, Ginger money, Ginger money. So when I see her, I think, ‘Ginger money, Ginger money, Ginger money. And what we need is a president who will get this country back on the track to prosperity for all Americans, so when we think of that president, we can say, President money, president money, president money. 

And then two women started talking loudly to each other. I said, “I have the mic”, but I lost control of the crowd at that point. 

And then I woke up. 

Which is just as well, because I might have said something like this:

“Are you better off than you were four years ago?! And I would have said that with exuberance as if I expected everyone to say yes. And then done the comedy reaction where you make an embarrassed face and say: “Oh. Okay. Guess not.

“What about this? What’s the deal with Mitt Romney?

After pausing to get everyones attention, Id say: 

Do we really need a businessman to rescue our country from its financial problems? Do we really need someone who knows how to budget, cut costs, and spend wisely? Do we really need a problem-solver?

Again with exuberance, only this time, as if I expected everyone to say no. 

And then repeated the comedy reaction with the embarrassed face, but this time Id say: “Oh. Okay. Guess we do.”

Before the guards hauled me away, Id say:

“Go ahead and vote along party lines. Why let the facts and common sense get in your way?”

At which point, I would have wound up in a YouTube video like that one guy yelling, Don’t taser me bro!

This is what happens when you catch a glimpse of the DNC during commercials and then go to bed after eating Cocoa Puffs.
Dean

Thank you Tina and the rest of the castaways 
for so many happy childhood memories!


Please Note: Tina Louise appeared in my dream, but I have no knowledge of her thoughts and feelings on any subjects presented herein, so nothing herein reflects on her at all. She does not endorse or have any connection with this blog post. But I do admire what she and her fellow performers did on Gilligan’s Island