Wednesday, July 4, 2012

As You Celebrate Independence Day, Ask Yourself This:

Enough with all those superhero/fantasy excursions, 
let's get back to reality! ...


As You Celebrate 
Ask Yourself This:


I know. We don't like to think of ourselves as slaves. Slaves never do! But Dylan said it best when he sang:

Uploaded by  on Dec 15, 2010

Sure, we like to think we're free. That's the delusion that gets us through each day. After all, we're the freest country in the world! Right? Too bad we're owned by a Reptilian Race of Space Aliens who control everything that happens on Earth

Yeah, that's a bummer. But don't let that thought cause you to choke on your 4th of July hot dog. To be safe, make sure you only picnic with people who know the Heimlich.

Our birth certificates aren't for identification. They're deeds of ownership for the serpentine creatures who rule our world. (Read the fine print!) 

And sure, the phrase serpentine creatures can easily be bandied about in a derogatory manner. But I assure you that I'm not doing so. Not only because I don't want those in charge to strike at my heels. But because the hottest, sexiest people on this planet are serpentine creatures. 




Okay, all of them aren't serpentine. 


Some are lizardy. 

Or crocodily. 


Or even alligatory, depending upon which hemisphere they prefer.

My secret sources on this matter are uncharacteristically convoluted and unclear about the exact details. But why would somebody post something to the Internet if its not true?

As far as I can tell, the Internet has just as much authority and reliability as a newspaper, an encyclopedia, and FOX news


Obviously, as can be seen above, they have excellent costuming and/or outstanding shape-shifting abilities. But is that any different than people who wear too much makeup? It's not!

Whether it's the Reptilian Race from Alpha Centauri who enslave us. Or those Bullish Barbarians from Aldebaran who barbecue us for snacks. Or even our own selfishness and insecurities that trap us. Let's not take the freedoms we think we have for granted. Instead, let's be thankful for what we have, while we still have it. And share the good things we have with those who don't. 



Perhaps that's too much reality for one day. Let's just plug into The Matrix and slide back into the delusions that get us through life. Even if we are deluded, we have the best delusions of anyone else on this planet!

So don't let those forked tongue liars steal your joy. Instead, celebrate! Enjoy the happiest of Independence Days. And by all means, DON'T choke on your hot dog. Otherwise, the Snakes win. 

Blessings & Joy,
Dean

 

* This is a work of humor/parody. (I have to say that in order to throw the "Snakes" off track. Otherwise, they might come after me. Which would only give themselves away. So that's a silly idea Snakes. Instead, you should shower me with money, so I'll be too distracted with scuba diving, paramotoring, and kayaking down a chocolate river with Kirsten Dunst to even think about ... what was I saying?)


COMING FRIDAY: Jacko, Elvis, and The Albino Bigfoot

COMING MONDAY: Eyewitness Proof That Life Existed on Other Planets!

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

The Amazing Spider-Man Is Spectacular!

Is Spectacular!


Fun, fun, fun movie, which turned out to be a lot of fun. I also enjoyed it immensely. Loved it too.

I saw it in 2D, so I'll bet it's Super Dee Duper Spectacular in IMAX 3D!

I felt the story started slow. But overall, it more than made up for that once Peter Parker got spider powers!


Published on May 3, 2012 by 


What made this one work more than the previous three is that Spidey had a sense of humor!

That's what was missing. One of the best things about Spider-Man is his witty wisecracks.

Inevitably, in the comic book, that is, when he's in trouble and too busy trying to find a way to beat the bad guy, the super villain says something like: "Where's your funny banter now Spider-Man?"




Stan Lee had a hilarious cameo! One of the best parts of Marvel Superhero Movies is the Stan Lee cameo!

I also enjoyed C. Thomas Howell's role a lot! I didn't think the producers could create another moving scene like the subway scene from Spider-Man 2, but they did.

(I'm being vague so I don't ruin the movie for those who haven't seen it yet.)




In many ways, the story seemed too similar to Spider-Man 1. But Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone both did great.

Was it worth rebooting? Yes! If only for Spidey having a sense of humor!

When you see it, there's a scene shortly after the closing credits begin. Not at the very end. So once you see the scene, you can go.


Rest In Peace: 


The closing credits dedicated the movie In Loving Memory to Laura Ziskin and someone else. I think I talked to her once on the phone. She was nice. Cordial. Or maybe I emailed her. I think I communicated with her after the first Spider-Man movie came out, because I wrote a screenplay for my own superhero. Too bad Hollywood wants established heroes. Anyway, my heart goes out to her's and the other person's families, friends, and coworkers. Thank you for the many happy memories you created.

For more Spidey/Superhero fun, be sure to read my blog posts: The Superhero with the Most TV Shows, My Favorite Superhero Movies, and What Makes Spider-Man So Amazing?.



The following comments are intended for people 
who have already seen the movie -- 
-- Like I said, the movie started slow. I didn't think they needed all that stuff about his parents. The film makes it seem like only Peter Parker could have become Spider-Man. But the fun of Spidey is the hope that we could get bit and become superheroes ourselves. The comic book What If # 7 "What If Someone Else Besides Spider-Man Had Been Bitten By The Radioactive Spider?" had three different people (Colonel John Jameson, Flash Thompson, and Betty Brant) get bit by that illustrious radioactive spider.
-- I didn't like that Gwen knew Spider-Man's secret identity. Especially so soon! That took away the biggest conflict in superhero movies! Plus, a big source of turmoil for Pete/Spidey in the comic books is that Gwen Stacy loved Peter Parker, but hated Spider-Man, because she blamed Spidey for her father's death. But since they did that anyway, I liked how he said, "I'm bitten." And she said, "Me too." That was cute. Plus, once she knew his identity, I loved how she smacked the Lizard with a stool and came to his aid. She even knew that her dad made him promise to stay away from her to keep her safe. 
-- Didn't seem right that the Lizard snuck up on Spider-Man more than once, since the Web-Head has Spider Sense. Plus, he should never have been hit by the bullet fired by that one police officer either. 
-- The Police Force blaming Spider-Man for Captain Stacy's death would have made things more difficult for Spider-Man, so that got missed. Also missing was J. Jonah Jameson! 
-- Having said all that, and I probably have more to say, I enjoyed the movie. The effects were amazing. The movie was fun! The scene with the cranes being lined was deeply moving. And I understand that when you translate a book, even a comic book, some things need to be altered for the screen. But the way Spidey webbed Gwen after he threw her out the school window is what killed her in The Amazing Spider-Man # 121.


Monday, July 2, 2012

What Makes Spider-Man So Amazing?

What Makes Spider-Man So Amazing?


Uploaded by  on Feb 10, 2012


With the movie “The Amazing Spider-Man” coming out tomorrow (a.k.a. tonight at midnight!), this is the perfect time to discuss what makes Spidey so Spectacular!


Can you guess which bug inspired Stan Lee to create Spider-Man? 
(The answer appears below.) * 


Spider-Man first appeared in Amazing Fantasy # 15 **
in a story written by Stan Lee and illustrated by Steve Ditko.


Stan Lee made a teenager the superhero, in essence, making the sidekick the superhero! As if Robin got super powers and no longer had to endure Batman's condescension. Spider-Man doesn't need a wisecracking sidekick, because he's the hero and the comic relief all in one!

Although a re-boot of the movie franchise seems somewhat silly after only a few years running, I don't mind, because his sense of humor was sorely missing from the first three Spider-Man movies. (About one joke or two per movie is not enough!)

Although everyone hails Superman; and he makes heroic headlines, people fear Spider-Man; and The Daily Bugle posts headlines accusing Spidey of at best being a glory-hound; and at worst, being a criminal. Such bad publicity and several police warrants for his arrest cause most people not to cheer him, but to fear him.

Using the symbol of a spider didn't ingratiate Spidey with the public either. Thus, he's a hero whose efforts are rarely applauded. Which in effect proves he's no glory-hound as J. Jonah Jameson the editor of The Daily Bugle so adamantly asserts. If you've ever felt unappreciated, you can relate.

He didn't want to become a superhero. Often he tries to quit. Heroism isn't as fun for him as the other superheroes make it look. But he can't quit. Not for long anyway. Because the guilt and horror of his letting a crook get away still haunts him. Because that crook later killed his beloved Uncle Ben. This guilt drives him.



From Amazing Fantasy # 15:
"With the great power there must also come--great responsibility!"


Although he never wanted to become a superhero, he still needs to protect his secret identity. His widowed Aunt May who dotes on Peter Parker so much takes The Daily Bugle editorials as Gospel and thus fears Spider-Man with a passion. With her weak heart, the shock of finding out her fragile nephew is Spider-Man would kill her.

Stan Lee's brilliant at creating such amazing character dynamics:

~ Aunt May loves Peter Parker, but dreads Spider-Man, even going so far as smacking him with her purse when he tries to save her!

~ Flash Thompson, who bullies Peter Parker, founded the Spider-Man Fan Club!

~ The new movie changed things, but in the comic books, Gwen Stacy loved Peter, but hated Spider-Man, because she, the police, and the media blamed him for the death of her father.

~ Parker works for Jameson who would fire him if he knew he was Spider-Man.

So you see, besides the normal reasons other heroes have, Spidey needs to keep his identity a secret. Yet, in all the movies, he always seems to remove his mask on a whim. Even riding through the heart of New York City unmasked on a subway train in Spider-Man 2. How does anyone not know who he is?


From Amazing Spider-Man # 10.


Those fantastic character dynamics carry over to his villains too:

~ Spider-Man wants to defeat the Green Goblin, but he doesn't want to harm his best friend's dad.

~ Or later, his best friend, when he takes over the family business.

~ Spider-Man wants to stop the Lizard, but he doesn't want to hurt his friend and mentor Doctor Curt Connors.

~ At one point, Doctor Octopus dated Aunt May, so that put Pete in a pickle too.

Spider-Man's best efforts aren't always enough. He means well, but he sometimes causes more harm than good. There's never been an easy road for Spider-Man or Peter Parker. Often he bemoans "The old Parker luck" when things go awry. Sometimes he runs out of webbing. He doesn't always save the day either. If you've tried to help someone, only to be rebuffed, only to make things worse, you can relate too.

But it's not all bad. Usually one area of his life suffers while another thrives. He might catch a major villain as Spider-Man, only to have his girlfriend think Peter Parker's a coward for fleeing from danger, when actually he hurried away to change into his costume. Or Spider-Man might have to stop chasing a bad guy, so he can fulfill a prescription for Aunt May's heart medicine. Sometimes everything works out. Which sounds great, but sadly, that only means that, come next issue, he's going to face his biggest challenge yet! Stan Lee's a master showman at marketing and generating excitement for the next issue.

When needing a break from his studies, he enjoys web-slinging to clear his head. Lo and behold, that just so happens to be when so many crimes take place. What a coinky-dinky, huh?



From the first "Spider-Man" movie. 


Of course, his powers are amazing too! Enhanced strength, speed, and agility. Wall-climbing. Spider Sense! (A.k.a. Spidey-Sense.) The power that alerts Spider-Man of danger. When bullets get fired at him, his Spidey Sense helps him dodge out of the way. (When you feel doubts about a new venture, you can always say, "Sounds like a great deal, but my Spidey-Sense is tingling, so no thanks!")

Another brilliant idea was having Peter Parker (Spider-Man) invent his web-shooters! (Not what happened in the first three movies.) Encouraging young readers to stay in school and study. "So, they laughed at me for being a bookworm, eh? Well, only a science major could have created a device like this." Plus, he often saves the day using his scientific know-how in addition to his amazing spider powers.




Another lesson to learn from Stan Lee, is that his career isn't work, because he enjoys what he does so much! That's a key principle for achieving success.

That's the genius of Stan Lee! Easily one of the most prolific and most influential writers of the 20th century. 

The genius of Steve Ditko, the artist who created Spider-Man's original costume, is that the costume covers all of him. Thus, anybody could be in that costume. This helped generate reader/viewer identification as each person can imagine him/herself being Spider-Man/Spider-Woman.

Many thanks to Stan Lee and Steve Ditko for creating a world of fun with Spider-Man.




With knowledge, determination/faith, courage, a sense of humor, and the other skills God blesses you with, you can overcome anything.

The 24-Hour Flu robs him of his spider powers. Many of Spidey's super villains like Doctor Octopus, The Green Goblin, Mysterio, and even J. Jonah Jameson go to so much trouble, time, and expense to try to trap him, when all they have to do is cough in his face! 

Blessings & Joy,
Dean Burkey


For more Spidey/Superhero fun, be sure to read my blog posts: The Superhero with the Most TV ShowsMy Favorite Superhero Movies, and What Makes Spider-Man So Amazing?.

* Stan Lee saw a fly climbing the wall in his office and thought that climbing walls would make a cool super power that hadn’t been done before.

** The story was put in the last issue of a comic book being ended. A throwaway! Why? Because the publisher didn't think Spider-Man would actually connect with audiences. Stan Lee, not wanting his efforts to go to waste, put the story into the last issue of Amazing Fantasy. Fan letters came in; and soon Spider-Man had his own comic book: The Amazing Spider-Man!


Photo of and by: Gen Con Indy 2008 - costumes 171

Friday, June 29, 2012

The Superhero with the Most TV Shows



Uploaded by  on Jul 10, 2010

Spider-Man has the most television series of any comic book character. From 1967 to 2008, 9 Spider-Man series have been produced, soon to be 10. Some of these shows had several different openings, but I chose to include only one for each.

In order:

0:01 - Spider-Man (1967)
1:02 - The Amazing Spider-Man (1978)
2:04 - Spider-Man (tokusatsu) (1978)
3:24 - Spider-Man (1981)
4:26 - Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends (1981)
5:30 - Spider-Man (1994)
6:28 - Spider-Man Unlimited (1999)
7:12 - Spider-Man: The New Animated Series (2003)
7:42 - The Spectacular Spider-Man (2008)

Source for the above video and article: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nNRvz5BmPEQ

Thank you Spidey-Central for the video and other intriguing info.

I didn't realize that the wondrous Web-Head had the distinction of being the superhero with the most TV shows. But hey, now we know.

I haven't seen all these, but I do know that at least three of these shows ended with cliff-hangers.

SPOILER ALERT! Air deflectors on the rear of automobiles help keep cars on the ground at high speeds. Also, the following will reveal how these three series ended.




Spider-Man (1994): The graphics and stories were a big improvement over the original 1967 cartoon. They finally drew all the web lines on his costume! However, the series ended with Spider-Man joining Madame Web as they go into another dimension to search for Mary Jane Watson.

Spider-Man Unlimited (1999): Apparently, on the other side of the sun, in the same orbit as Earth is Counter Earth. Where the High Evolutionary created a race of beings that subjugates humans. Peter Parker/Spider-Man sneaks onto a space shuttle to rescue John Jameson, J. Jonah Jameson's son, who's stranded on Counter Earth. Only John doesn't want to leave, because he wants to help rescue the human race on that planet. Symbiotes Venom and Carnage stowed away on the same shuttle. Trapped there too, Spidey joins the fight. Spidey has cool new costume. Series ended with the Synoptic spewing seeds everywhere, which meant everyone would be turned into mindless pods, thanks to the symbiotes.




Spider-Man: The New Animated Series (2003): MTV's fun cartoon that came out after the first Spider-Man movie. Starred the voices of Neil Patrick Harris as Peter Parker/Spider-Man, Lisa Loeb as Mary Jane Watson, and Ian Ziering as Harry Osborn. Ended with Peter Parker tossing his Spider-Man costume into the bay after a mind-messing villain tricked Spider-Man into clobbering a friend of Peter Parker's, leaving her in a coma and possibly paralyzed. 



Having the most TV shows of any superhero is quite an honor, so please come back Monday, July 2, for my special Spider-Man blog post about why Spidey's so popular. 



Blessings & Joy,
Dean

Spider-Man was created by writer Stan Lee and artist Steve Ditko.

For more Spidey/Superhero fun, be sure to read my blog posts: My Favorite Superhero Movies, What Makes Spider-Man So Amazing?, and The Amazing Spider-Man Is Spectacular!.


Photo of and by: Gen Con Indy 2008 - costumes 171

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Nuts to You?! No, Nuts for Them. To Save Their Lives!


Published on Mar 22, 2012 by 

Give live-saving food and care: http://donate.worldvision.org/product//1753174?campaign=105418219

Save a life by sponsoring a child through World Vision today:http://bit.ly/Sponsorachild


It is an unnecessary tragedy that a child dies from hunger and related causes every 15 seconds. Millions more are at risk of physical and mental impairment from chronic hunger. And nearly one billion people go to bed hungry every night.

Today, you can provide life-saving food, agricultural support, livestock, clean water, medicines, and other essential care to hungry children and families around the world. And because of grant funds and donated goods, your gift multiplies 5 times in impact to help save lives. 

World Vision is committed to responding to the needs of hungry children and families. Any gift you give today will help provide the emergency food children need to survive — vitamin-rich beans, maize, and other nutritious grains and vegetables. Plus, you'll help feed them for years to come by giving their families vegetable seeds, farming tools, strong livestock, clean water, and other vital assistance. 

Remember, your gift multiplies 5 times to help the hungry. Thank you for giving so generously and please keep these children and families in your prayers. 

Statistical sources: UN World Food Program, UN Food and Agriculture Organization

Article Source: http://donate.worldvision.org/OA_HTML/xxwv2ibeCCtpItmDspRte.jsp?item=1753174&go=item&xxwvCampaign=2031092

Please hear our pleas and donate now

Your Donation Today not only helps to save lives, but makes 5 times the positive impact!

Some organizations have such a high overhead that barely a fifth of what's donated actually helps those in need. With World Vision, over 80 %* goes to help those in need. That means, with 5 times the impact, well over 4 times what you donate helps those in need. Thus, $25 provides over $100 of aid and relief.

You don't need to be bitten by a radioactive spider to be a super hero/heroine to someone in need. 

Photo provided by http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spider-Man 
from Amazing Fantasy # 15, written by Stan Lee, art by Steve Ditko.

You don't even have to shoot webs or wear Spandex. Just say no to seconds. Skip the jumbo latte. Every $5 provides over $20 of relief. Missing a treat or two won't mean that much to you, but it'll mean life to someone else. 

Blessings & Joy,

* With World Vision, less than 15 % of the money they receive goes to fundraising, management, and general costs, which means over 85 % goes to help those in need. Unlike other organizations where the people line their pockets with 90 % or more, so that less than 10 %, if that much, helps anyone. Give where your money will do the most good.

Monday, June 25, 2012

Faith like a Ketchup Seed


It's not the faith of a mustard seed, 
but it still guides me through life 
and tastes great on hot dogs.


For less than a buck on Kindle
you can enjoy lots of laughs
possibly find inspiration
and maybe cry a tear or two. 

I said can, possibly, and maybe
I make no guarantees, 
but I do feel emphatic that you will find 
at least one or two things that you love 
and one or two that you hate
(Or don't love as much.)

A few of my favorites are: 
An Ice Memoir (One Molecule Can Make a Difference), 
Church Skit: Interview with Jesus, 
Across the Multiverse, and 
Upside-Down Sharks Prove the Existence of God.

Your favorites might differ from mine completely. 
That's the power of variety.
And the joy of subjectivity.

Unfunny folks who cannot comprehend satire and parody 
may find themselves offended by: 
You're a Christian What?!, Stalker Almighty, 
Satan's Cereals, and more. 

Sadly, some people can't find the humor 
in a ham and cheese sandwich 
being possessed by dark forces.
(Which shows how little they know about nutrition.) 

makes a great companion piece to my first book: 
Holy Laughter! Humor in the Bible

Enjoy them both for less than four dollars. 


Blessings & Joy,