Some of My
Miscellaneous Silly Thoughts
Miscellaneous Silly Thoughts
by Dean Burkey
Photo Source:
Preservation Hall Comedy Show, June 1, 2012
I opened for the ImprovAddicts!
(Turns out that I closed for them too, when I won The Eliminator.)
Picture Taken by David Wehman
If God wanted men to cry,
He would’ve given us tear ducts.
When you contract chicken pox as an adult,
they should call it rooster pox.
Sounds more mature.
And for men,
it sounds much more macho.
“Hey Charlie, I hear you got chicken pox.”
“No way Bob, I got rooster pox!”
Don’t you love how our computers are so polite?
When they stop responding,
they take the time to tell us
that they’re not responding.
If they’ve got the energy and resources
to tell us they’re not responding,
why don’t they just use that same energy and resources
to respond?!
A bird in the hand
is worth two in the bush.
Half a bird in the hand?
One in the bush.
... Duhhhh!
Behind every happy man is a woman.
Behind every happy woman is a cabana boy.
Behind every happy cabana boy is a swimming pool.
Ergo, swimming pools make people happy.
Unless they’re above ground.
‘Cause those just get on everybody’s nerves.
Especially the sucker who cuts the grass.
Some turkey broke my clavicle
and made a wish.
An Eskimo witch
is sure to give you a cold spell.
I wear a tomato-colored coat for a reason.
Everyone wants to be God.
Until you realize the hours.
Blessings & Joy,He would’ve given us tear ducts.
When you contract chicken pox as an adult,
they should call it rooster pox.
Sounds more mature.
And for men,
it sounds much more macho.
“Hey Charlie, I hear you got chicken pox.”
“No way Bob, I got rooster pox!”
Don’t you love how our computers are so polite?
When they stop responding,
they take the time to tell us
that they’re not responding.
If they’ve got the energy and resources
to tell us they’re not responding,
why don’t they just use that same energy and resources
to respond?!
A bird in the hand
is worth two in the bush.
Half a bird in the hand?
One in the bush.
... Duhhhh!
Behind every happy man is a woman.
Behind every happy woman is a cabana boy.
Behind every happy cabana boy is a swimming pool.
Ergo, swimming pools make people happy.
Unless they’re above ground.
‘Cause those just get on everybody’s nerves.
Especially the sucker who cuts the grass.
Some turkey broke my clavicle
and made a wish.
An Eskimo witch
is sure to give you a cold spell.
I wear a tomato-colored coat for a reason.
If you don’t want to play chess anymore,
I’ll just take the pawn
back to the ring shop.
I’ll just take the pawn
back to the ring shop.
Until you realize the hours.
Photo Source: Same as before.
Another Picture Taken by David Wehman
Here are the ImprovAddicts
before we got team shirts!
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