I could’ve been Keanu Reeves in The Matrix.
Yeah, it’s true.
Morpheus came to me first.
The only problem was,
he brought Trinity with him.
And that was only a problem,
because Trinity can be very distracting.
If you know what I mean.
She looked so fine
in her shiny, black leather outfit,
that I couldn’t really hear
what Morpheus was saying.
But as I gawked at Trinity’s kinky, sexy ways,
I heard Morpheus offer me a blue pill.
So I said, “Thank you!”
And gobbled it down. Thinking it was something else.
But instead of lifting my spirits,
so to speak,
that little blue pill put me to sleep.
The last thing I remember
was hearing Morpheus ask Trinity,
“Why are all these fools taking the little blue pill?
All right.
How many more The Ones are on the list?”
Bill Cosby:
Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older,
I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.
Richard Pryor:
Marriage is really tough
because you have to deal with feelings
... and lawyers.
Dean Burkey:
When a guy knock s a girl up,
her dad knocks him down.
George Carlin:
Do illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup?
Jerry Seinfeld:
I was the best man at the wedding.
If I'm the best man,
why is she marrying him?
